Jumping Fences

Today I had a very good reminder of the old saying “The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence”. The only thing is that it never really is. Despite outward appearances, no one ever has the perfect life.

I was reminded of this today when talking with someone on the phone who doesn’t yet know me well. This person doesn’t know that I am ill, or what my life is really like. To them, I seem like I have it all. Good home, all of the comforts that money buys. I don’t work hard, I don’t have much in the way of responsibility other than to myself. I travel and do alot of exotic things that most people only dream of. At least that is how it looks on the outside.

To her, my life seems so perfect. I have a very green yard looking over the fence at it. Living it however is a whole other challenge. You can’t see from over the fence reality.

I have seen many people envy and be envied for various reasons. Some for their beauty, other for their wealth. But even those things come with a double edged sword. Beauty fades, and one needs to constantly maintain that beauty to hold it for as long as possible. When that is gone, then what? It takes a great deal of discipline, effort and work to maintain beauty. People who have money constantly worry about keeping hold of it. There are always people who want to take it from you, or those who will only like you because of what you have.

I have also see women envy other women for the husbands that they choose. No one ever knows what goes on behind closed doors. He can be the greatest guy in public, but the biggest jerk in private. I know, I was involved with one of those not too long ago. All of the money in the world didn’t make me happy with him. Little did anyone know how verbally abusive he was in private. All the world saw was this successful man with a great fun loving personality.

My friend the Tree looked to be someone to be envied from the outside. Her grass looked oh so green. She and her husband are beautiful physically, wealthy, educated, sophisticated, well travelled, have two absolutely brilliant and beautiful children and a magnificent home. But, it doesn’t show that her husband is a bi-polar, drug abusing, very sick person. You can’t see the hell that he has put her through. So with all of that green grass to look at, her garden is merely spray painted to look that way.

Understand that we all have “crap” to deal with in our lives. No one ever has it perfect. Not that I have seen anyway. There is no such thing as perfection when it comes to life. We all have to take our fair share of drama and unhappiness, and depression. That is simply the way it works. No one ever gets a free ride ticket.

So instead of envying someone else, you might want to put that energy into making your own life as good as you can… right? Wanting what it is you have and being satisfied is a good start….